Working It Out With You
by Sylvarra
Summary: Eliza opens up to Jordan about the worst day of her life over one too many drinks. He's there to pick up the pieces and lend her a shoulder-or chest, rather-to cry on. After all the good she'd brought into his life, he figured that he could at least begin to repay the favor. He owed her that much. (Port from my Ao3 account!)


Her room was small; smaller than Jordan remembered but he supposed he wasn't drunk last time he'd been there. It smelled like sweet perfume, green apple shampoo, and frankincense and myrrh from Eliza's incense burner. She had a blackout curtain over her window and the room was only lit by the dull incense sticks and an orange lava lamp- a gift from Jordan himself for her birthday the year before.

He turned slightly to stare at Eliza, watching her throw back a mostly empty bottle of beer, letting it drain of its contents, and tossing it unceremoniously onto the ground when she was done. "Do we have more? I...I need more," she leaned back and closed her eyes, grimacing softly.

"I don't think you _need more,_ 'Liza. What's going on with you? You usually don't act like this," he paused and sighed, carding a hand through his hair. "Usually don't _drink_ like this, either." She mumbled to herself and cracked open an eye to look at him, a small smile gracing her features. He melted under her half gaze and before he could shake off the feeling she'd opened her eyes and leaned close to him. He felt the need to say something so he whispered, "and no, that was the last bottle. Sorry." She shrugged and reached out to bump his shoulder with her fist. "It's okay," she whispered back, something changing in her eyes. Jordan noticed when she dropped her smile. How could he not?

"There's something I gotta tell you, Jordan. It's a big deal to me and...and I think I trust you enough to tell you, you know?" He frowned but nodded anyway. She could tell him anything, he was there for her just like always.

She bent over the edge of her bed and produced a bottle of scotch from under it. "I was hoping I wouldn't have to crack this open so soon but here we are, huh? Better to share it with you than others, I guess." Jordan smiled faintly at her and she stifled a giggle. "We're drunk, Jordan."

"No, 'Liza, _you're_ drunk. I am slightly tipsy," he quipped back, leaning against the wooden backboard of her bunk bed. He watched her carefully crack the seal of the bottle and set the cap aside. "Where in the hell did you get this? Looks expensive," he asked, but she shook her head. "Was a gift. I don't really buy the stuff anymore." There was that face again. Jordan shifted a bit, his eyes glancing around the room to avoid her gaze. He didn't want to pressure her into speaking. She squinted at him before offering up the bottle. "You want a drink first? You're my _esteemed guest_ after all," she chided, nudging his chest with the bottle carefully.

"I would be honored, Eliza. Thank you," he joked back at her, giving her a mocking little bow before grabbing the bottle and bringing it to his lips for a drink. The warm liquid burned his throat going down but he enjoyed the feel, smirking at Eliza when she rolled her eyes at him for taking such a long pull from the bottle. She snatched it back from his hands and took a shorter drink, prompting Jordan to open his mouth to tease her, before she abruptly handed the bottle back to him and shot up off of her bed.

"I need to piss. I'll be back," she was already in the bathroom connected to the room when she finished her sentence. Jordan laughed at her and shook his head, drinking from the bottle again. The heater in the room kicked on and he groaned, setting the bottle on her nightstand and shrugging off his jacket, leaving him in a grungy old t-shirt. It was covered in grease stains and holes from welders and torches from experiments he'd done in the past. Part of him wished he could take it off, but he knew that Eliza would take him _down_ if he did. He looked around the dim room and smiled at the pictures of her and her family back in Israel. A few with her _Abba_, her _Eema_, her _Savta_ and _Bubbe_ as Jordan remembered her calling her family. He stared for particularly long at a photograph of Eliza with her grandmother and grandfather, all happy and smiles and in her military fatigues. She always said that they were upset with her decision to enter the military but he thought that they looked proud of her.

Her door opened and he turned in a panic to see Meghan standing in the doorway.

"Oh, cool. She found someone to keep her company already," she looked around the room, searching for Eliza no doubt. "She in the bathroom?" Jordan nodded and turned to look at the faint light coming from beneath the door. Meghan cleared her throat and Jordan turned back to her sheepishly. "I know you care about her, Jordan. So man up a little and take care of her, be there for her. Just..." she paused and breathed deeply through her nose for a moment as if trying to keep calm. "Just don't you dare fucking hurt her, Jordan. Or I will gut you like a fish myself," she glared at him as she spoke, but there was a softness in her voice. Had he been _that_ obvious about his feelings for her? He didn't think so but even still...he opened his mouth to ask and she shook her head, evidently already quite aware of what he planned to say. "No, smart guy. She's as dense as you when it comes to this sort of shit. She's too proud to admit anything either, so don't even think about waiting for _her_ to make a move on _you_." Jordan furrowed his brow and she smiled at him, pulling open the door carefully. "Good talk, Trace."

Then, she left. He stood staring at where she had just been, slightly baffled that anyoneknew about how he felt for his colleague. _You're fine Jordan, just act like you always do. Make 'Liza laugh and get a little drunk with her. Dance around your feelings and-_

"Sorry I took so long in there," Eliza came out of the bathroom speaking, falling back onto her bed. "You...need something? You're standing and you definitely weren't before." He felt his pulse quicken but he licked his lips and turned toward her.

"I was looking at your pictures you have hung up. Your family seems wonderful, 'Liza. And you...you look really damn happy." She let out a small 'oh" and her eyes fell to the sheets on her bed. Jordan suddenly worried that he'd said the wrong thing but Eliza rebounded fairly quickly and shrugged at him. He smiled and turned back to look at the pictures on the wall. "So, this is her, huh? Your infamous grandma?" She _tsked_ and he turned quick enough to see her roll her eyes at him.

"_Savta_, actually. Thanks, Jordan. But...yeah. That's her. She wasn't particularly happy with my decision to join up you know? But I think that she was just happy that I was happy." She reached to her nightstand to grab the bottle of liquor that Jordan had entirely forgotten about. She drank from it, her pull longer than the last one she'd taken. Jordan nodded, impressed by the drink, but turned away to run a hand along the photo of Eliza with her whole family, smiling warmly as he admired it. "I wish you could meet them, Jordan. They'd feel better knowing I have you to watch my back," she said, the bed squeaking minutely as she shifted on it. "I know I do."

He turned to stare at her, the light from the lava lamp illuminating her hair and eyes in the prettiest way. She looked like she was shimmering, but Jordan supposed that he could just be making shit up because he'd had a bit too much to drink. The room went absolutely silent and he had to say something, had to respond to her somehow. "I..." he sighed, their eyes still transfixed on each other. "I'm glad that you feel safe with me. I feel the same, 'Liza. I know you'll look out for me, too." They shared a genuine smile and both looked away from each other. Jordan collected himself before turning back to her, deciding to return to his place on her bed. He sat closer than he had before and she moved closer in turn so they were only a hand width apart.

Neither of them were very good at relationships. They didn't take to social cues very well and Jordan was the first to admit it. Add on the fact that he wasn't used to being so open with her and sitting as close as they were made Jordan's head feel fuzzy.

Eliza took a heavy, shallow breath before resting a hand on Jordan's thigh. "I'm ready to tell you. I don't-" she paused to breath again and Jordan wondered if she was about to panic. He placed a hand over hers, resting so very gently on his leg and lightly placed a hand upon her back as extra comfort. "Sorry this is...hard. Harder than I wanted it to be- I just can't find words to make it easy for me to say and I _hate_ feeling like this because it isn't _me_," she rambled, the hand she'd previously laid on his leg curling into a fist. His own hand grabbed tightly to it and squeezed, rubbing circles over one of her knuckles.

"Take your time. We have all weekend, 'Liza. Don't rush yourself into talking about it," he offered and she nodded her head in response. They fell silent again, but Jordan thought against breaking the fragile quiet when he heard the way Eliza's breath quivered when she exhaled.

They sat like that for what felt like hours, but according to Eliza's wall clock was only seven minutes.

"Okay. I'm definitely ready now." She let out a deep breath and Jordan instinctively pulled her a little bit closer. "When I was in college, doing my exchange program in Boston, I went to exactly one party. It took me almost the entire damn semester to convince myself that going to at least one was a good idea. Let me preface by saying: it wasn't. It was a horrible idea, Jordan." His stomach lurched and he felt his face turn a little pallid. "I went to this party at a frat house with my roommates. I was the same smartass then as I am now, but I was less confident. They all had boyfriends and they ditched me, so instead of grabbing my coat and heading back to our dorm, I decided to stay and chat up a cute guy I'd seen walking around. He didn't _seem_ like a bad guy. We talked and he offered to grab me a drink. He brought me over to the table all his friends were at and promised to be right back. I should have left then, but I was stupid and a little drunk and I didn't think anything bad could happen to me. But...but when he came back with the drink and I took a few sips-" she stopped and turned to face Jordan directly. She was shaking like a leaf in the wind and Jordan wanted desperately to be able to hold her and comfort her but he couldn't. Not while she told him this story.

"Something didn't feel right. My lips started to tingle, and then my hands and feet and arms and- and then I couldn't really feel them at all. I could barely breathe and I was so out of it. I told them that I needed to go to the doctor because I felt really bad but the way I'd gone all numb made it almost impossible for me to walk or talk. And then these guys took advantage of me Jordan. They _promised_ that they would take me to a doctor. They helped me out to one of the guy's cars and they all _fucking promised_ that when I woke up I'd be safe and sound in the hospital!" Her voice cracked over the last word and she brought up her free hand to hug herself. Jordan tugged her a little closer and wrapped his arm around her carefully, still looking intently into her fearful and angry eyes.

"But damn it you _know_ what they did instead. They took me to their dorm and they..." she let out a whimper and let her tears begin to fall. "And they raped me. I woke up to it and thrashed around for a bit until they got bored of me fighting back and dosed me again. I don't know how long they did it for. I don't want to even think about that. But when I finally came-to I was in that _stupid fucking frat house_ and these twelve idiot frat boys who had no idea why this foreign girl who didn't speak great English was so freaked out. They got me a taxi back to my dorm and I just...sat in there, Jordan. For weeks. I hurt myself. I cut, I bruised, I didn't eat..hell, I don't think I left my room more than ten times in that five or six week period. My grades slipped, I was almost sent back to Israel but I _knew_ I couldn't just go home right after all of that. So I invested myself in the idea of the military. I wanted to be able to stop _those kinds of motherfuckers_ from doing that sort of shit to anyone else."

Jordan hadn't ever heard her curse so much. It was deeply upsetting and he felt his blood boiling at the thought of someone hurting Eliza like that. He didn't know what sort of face he was making but she frowned deeper when she saw it and it drew him from his deep thoughts. "Why do _you_ look angry, Jordan? You're not the one who got sexually assaulted in Boston when you were in your early twenties, are you?" She was still crying and he knew that when the adrenaline she'd gained from recounting the tale was gone, she would breakdown.

"Am I not allowed to be pissed off that someone hurt you? Eliza, you know how much I care about you! Or maybe you don't, but I-" Jordan stopped before he could cross an invisible boundary that he had set for himself ages ago. "Nevermind what I think right now." They stared at each other until her silent tears turned into weeping and she was stricken with convulsions and she could hardly catch her breath. He kept his hand on her back, holding her, but not too close. She slipped her hand from his grasp and sat back a bit, to try to catch her breath. She hiccuped quietly and shook her head, rubbing one of her temples gingerly. She stopped moving for just a moment to stare directly into Jordan's eyes. He couldn't describe the pain he felt in that moment; it was almost as if her emotions bled into him and filled him with a type of pain that wasn't right, that didn't belong to him. He tried to place it but he was quickly knocked back onto the bed by Eliza pushing him down with a hug. She wept into the neck lining of his t-shirt and he stroked her hair, humming and hushing her, whispering incomprehensible words to her to try to calm her down.

"Thank you for telling me, 'Liza. Thank you for trusting me." His voice was barely audible but from her place above him, Eliza nodded. Her tears stained his shirt now, too and he didn't mind. He was helping her after all those years of her helping him.

"Yeah, Jordan. Wouldn't have it any other way." She tried to calm her sobs, breathing deeply and nuzzling deeper into his chest. And through it all, Jordan laid there, rubbing her back and holding her protectively; he stared up at the frame of the top bunk for awhile, wondering who used to sleep there. Eliza shifted so her face was pressed against Jordan's neck and he felt his cheeks heat at the contact. He felt stupid for wishing that she was doing this for a different reason and snorted in spite of himself. "Jordan?" She lifted her chin up a little bit to try to look at him, but he didn't turn to meet her gaze.

"Don't worry your pretty little head now, 'Liza. I was just thinking." She buried her face into his neck again, but he could feel a smile playing on her lips. His heart fluttered at the feeling and he cursed himself. _You're so in love Jordan. Give up._ But still, he thought of what Meghan said and his chest felt uncomfortably tight. He wasn't sure that he believed her, that Eliza cared about him too, but he wanted to. He held her a little tighter and took a deep breath.

They laid like that for awhile, just breathing and feeling the warmth of each other when Eliza pulled away from him. Her cheeks were still wet and she looked sad, but she still tried to smile for him.

"What are we doing, Jordan...?" Eliza looked down at him, her gaze shifting from his face to the floor. He was confused; he didn't really know what she meant by that, at least he didn't think he did. He propped himself up on his arms and blushed as he realized that she was straddling one of his legs. He silently praised the glow of the lava lamp that was undoubtedly concealing the pink hue. "Why are we drinking together in my bed if this doesn't mean anything?" She sat back on her heels and shook her head. "Why am I telling you all of this if it doesn't _mean anything_?! This is-"

""Liza it _does_ mean something. It does to me," Jordan sat up all the way, coming closer to Eliza, almost too close. "We don't have to know what we're doin' right now, do we? As long as this means something," he paused and recoiled a bit. "_If_ it means something..." he considered the fact that it might just be an empty moment for her. It made him sad, but he still knew that _maybe_ she was just unloading on him because they were friends and _just friends. _

"Yeah. God...yeah. It means something to me, too, Jordan." She looked back to him and her tears were still falling but she looked happier, a broken smile forming across her lips.

"I'm glad." He smiled back at her, staring at her eyes that were brimming with tears. "Come here," he said gently, ushering her back toward him. She came closer again, and rested her head on his shoulder, not-so-stealthily drying her cheeks on his shirt again. When she pulled back again, the stared at each other for a moment, each entirely silent, not even so much as a breath between them. But then she leaned forward and pressed her lips to his, carefully, gently, afraid of shattering the precious moment. It was so entirely Eliza, he thought, to kiss him after all that. She pulled back and laughed quietly at him. She kissed him again, quicker and more forceful, and a third time which was barely a brush of her lips against his. She hopped off of him and stood, shaking out the tension. "Should I go?" He asked, sitting up and swinging his legs off the bed.

"Probably," she replied, shrugging. "I have a date with ice cream and Netflix, and you won't want to join me for it." She turned around to look at him, bringing her hands up to cup his face _almost_ tenderly. "But...maybe next time?" She was acting totally different from before, and Jordan was glad. She seemed almost happy again. "This has been good. For both of us, I think." Jordan nodded and stood, smiling at her.

"I think so too, 'Liza." He walked to the door and left, only stopping to turn to her and say, "you've brought a helluva' lot of good into my life...I'm just happy that I can start repaying the favor."


End file.
